News and Updates

 18/02/2019

Holy fucking shit.

A year.

A fucking year.

Let me explain a few things:

Thanks to my previous place of work, my writing basically died. Not just Metal Gear Mercenaries, but the actual projects I had undertaken to, y'know, make a name for myself. My poetry, my short stories, that one novella every schlub says they're going to write: Everything went fucking south.

Including my life.

Y'see, I kept writing bits and pieces, telling myself "I'll update next month". Which turned into the following month. Which turned into the following month. Which turned into the following month. Etc; etc; et al.

The reason for this is my previous job.

Yeah. Previous. You read that right.

See, around 2018 my job decided to go from "part time we swear" to "your soul is ours". Being a night worker is very different from day work: Whereas people could come home from a day job and have a few hours to do what they want, I didn't. My days literally went:

Go to work -> Come home (A two hour trek) -> Sleep -> Wake up -> Eat -> Go to work -> Repeat

I legitimately had no time to do anything. I had days off, sure, but my body and mind was so wracked that writing was the last thing on it. I tried to sit down on more than one occasion and force stuff out, but nothing came. For any project of mine. My brain was mushed together because I had things to prioritise now that I had no life. Writing, sadly, came last.

What was a part time job became full time because, fucking A, people left. So rather than hire staff because this was a massive purple bastard of a hotel chain that eats profits and shits misery, I was left to pick up the slack.

In July of last year, the head night porter left. Rather than replace him, I was the one to pick up the shit. More regular shifts, more hours, more sleep, less time for me. On top of that, he was a friend. A good friend. Not like "Be the Godfather to my kid", but the kind of guy who go into work with and know shit's gonna be alright because you're competent workers and you like eachother.

 Even then, my wage packet seemed to stagnate.

For all the personal time I was fucking losing, I wasn't earning anywhere near the money I earned at my last job for something that was easier.

The honeymoon period was, like Kofi Kingston at Elimination Chamber last night, really fucking over. I watched as MANAGERS left and as middle managers left. Writing was being written on the wall, essentially saying "HOLY FUCKING SHIT THIS BE A WARNING SIGN BRUH". But no, I stayed on. People complained about the situation but it fell on deaf ears. People left in droves, to the point where I was the only original staff members to stay.

Well, til September.

In August, my family had its traditional Scottish summer holiday. And it sucked, to be quite frank. We were in the middle of actual fucking nowhere (Mull of Kintyre, to be precise) with nothing nearby for miles. And very little to do.

And I didn't write.

After a few days into this holiday, my mind finally snapped:

"Why am I doing this?"

Four simple words. One simple letter. What was the fucking point? I was miserable, I was depressed, I was angry at everything and I had no more dreams.

But that's not all it was.

Y'see, I did have a very good chance to regain my time when I requested a transfer to Middlesbrough. See, readers, I live in Middlesbrough. I had to travel to a town called Darlington which is a half hour train ride away. With a 45 minute bus ride to the train station to.

A transfer to Middlesbrough would slash my travel time from roughly two hours to 45 minutes. Or even 10 with a taxi ride.

I had over two years experience. When the site was erected, I was screwed by management. I was overlooked. I was never told when the transfer was. But nobody screws me without buying me a drink first, so I got my resume in just in time.

I was refused.

The reason being they didn't want me around when all eyes were on it.

Because, like everybody else in the hotel I worked in, I was sick and I was vocal about it. Dissent is not allowed. YOU ARE ONLY ALLOWED TO BE HAPPY AND SMILY. Despite being the best person I could be for our guests, I was told "No."

A few months later, I tried again as there was a position open. I went for an interview. I nailed it.

I was turned down. Somebody was a "better fit" despite the fact that I told them, in an emergency, I could be there in 10 minutes. I was there to make a career. Not good enough.

I was betrayed. They told me this transfer was essentially my right, and they had shit on it. They had tore it apart.

And I was beginning to openly rebel against this shit.


A few more weeks following my holiday in Scotland, I tried. I fucking tried. Then I kept looking at my rotas, saw that I was getting shift after shift after shift with a person who was horrendously underqualified. This was a person whom management had to step in to get to do his job, because he simply could not do it properly. This was a man who couldn't pour a drink properly.

I disliked working with him immensely, to the point where when I had to work with him, I felt violently ill. He was doing half the work for the same amount of pay.

One week ended it all.

I was booked in with somebody else. We had hired another competent individual, but I was consistently booked in with this utter moron and another person who, while they were useless at a lot of the administration side of work, could handle the guests. This man, this goon I complain about (Who will be called El Goono from here), could do nothing right.

This other competent individual called in a string of sick days.

I worked one day, they called in, I worked with El Goono. It was a miserable night. I worked the next night, they called in, I worked with El Goono.

On the third night, I wrote up my notice. Come morning, I handed it in.

I was freed in October.

First they told me it was a mistake, there's nothing out there, it's gonna be rough.

Dear readers, i've been unemployed before. It ain't easy, but with a nest-egg like mine it's much more easier. I know my worth.

Then they told me they were disappointed I was leaving because I was a pet project and the manager wanted to do all he could to get my transfer.

Like the two other times he'd tried? Pfft.

Then they began to BEG. Asked me what it would take me to stay. Pay rise? Less hours? Different staff?

Employers and/or Managers who are reading this: If your staff is only valuable enough to earn a pay rise when they have one foot out of the door, you are fucking scum. You should keep people while they're in, not try and drag them back when they're out.

I refused everything. I wanted out.

And I got it.

On that fateful, cold October morning, I handed in my uniform and walked out the door. I literally danced in the street. I am highly introverted, ladies and gentlemen, and I DANCED in the street because I was finally unleashed.



So, since October, you may wonder "WHY NOT FUCKING POST?": Well, for the approximately one reader who is asking that, the answer is simple: It's a big, black shaggy dog that Winston Churchill loved writing about.

Depression.

It's a long, hard battle. In fact, it's a battle you never win. Depression WILL kill you eventually. Whether a heart attack because it wore down that pumping organ, or your demons finally nestle in that crack in your brain and you take the final curtain call: It wins. Because you can never cure it. It's incurable. You can remedy it with antidepressants, sure, but you can never cure it.

So for the past few months, it's been an uphill battle. I'll be honest, i've done little of note aside from applying to jobs. I've got in touch with friends, finally got rid of a few traitors who decided to stab me in the back during my lowest times and i've had days out.

I've gotten my life back.

And in the last month, I finally got THE MOJO back.

The Mojo. It's what I always felt writing Metal Gear Mercenaries. When i'd get into writing, have some music blasting in my ears and a cup of tea at my side. I'd feel alive, giddy and open. I'd re-read portions of writing and laugh. I'd grin ear-to-ear.

Those days were dead for TWO FUCKING YEARS.

AND NOW THEY'RE FUCKING BACK.

 I'M BACK.

I'm back.
When will the next entry be? I don't know. I'm getting back in the groove. It's a slow process. But I will get there. It's a quite long process writing this blog: I try to collate it with the games events in a sensible way, which requires research and watching playthroughs. Then I have to write things that I like. That people MIGHT like. And believe it or not, I will often delete entire sections because it feels "meh".

But, we are back.

We are fucking back.

I'm back.

I'm alive.

And i've got a lot more material to work with.


Let's 'ave a fucking go, then.  


 01/02/2018

Yep, as I said, the next entry did not come out. However, this update is to let you know that work on it is continuing as normal. I've got a few weeks coming up giving me good chunks of time to work on it, so i'm absolutely hoping it'll be out come the end of February. We'll certainly see, though.

31/12/2017

Yep, it's almost new year and it's an update! I was originally going to publish it on Christmas Day but I figured it wouldn't make sense. The end of the Virtuous Mission should be marked by the end of the year, and so it goes.

The next entry WON'T be in January. This is due to a major upheaval at my place of work and me having to pick up the slack. Rest assured that, with a holiday in February and with work on the third part having chugged along nicely, we will at least be looking for a first quarter release. I'm still abiding by "make no goddamn promises you loser" so there is really no set date.

Work on the Special Saga is also still chugging along. 

04/12/2017

Told you we weren't dead yet!

The first preview of the first "Special Saga" is up for viewing on the relevant page. When the time comes to actually post it, I'll probably end up putting each entry on a new page, and leaving them up for a few months after the following entry is written before placing them all in order (Top to bottom, first to last) on the Master Page (Which is what i'm calling it because fuck originality)

The next entry is coming along...alright. I want to at least get most of it pumped out before the end of the week because next Monday i'm back at work which I really fucking hate and my desire to write will doubtlessly be shattered by the general fuckery that's with that horrible place.

Just chugging along at my usual pace.


30/11/2017

No, we're not dead yet. Not even close, boys!

First entry in just over seven months. So the good news is that I am technically releasing this entry before eight months. The bad news is that it's still a long-ass wait. There's a myriad of reasons for this, mostly work. And when you work the hours I do, writing happens to come last on the things to do. On top of that, i've taken a more...proactive approach to my life, and am getting out, seeing things and doing stuff whereas before I was a big fat shut-in. By the way guys, online dating? Man that shit is more miss than hit.

As you will see (I'm writing this update prior to tonight's publication), this entry is a little smaller. I'm hoping that cutting the entries down into smaller chunks will allow me to attain a more regular release schedule. It should also mean we'll have a third entry up before the end of the year (Holy fuck do not take my word as law on that one.)

Right now there is still a lot going on. The miscellaneous sagas are still being written and i'll be putting up teaser pages later for the one in particular that's actually closer to completion (Which isn't saying a lot).

I have started taking semi-regular holidays (Literally the only benefit of working unsocial hours) and i'm focusing more on writing. Today was lucky in that the urge hit me hard and we're moments away from the publication of the latest entry. It also meant that the follow-up entry is coming along well too. I might even get it finished next week STOP TYPING SHIT YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO ABIDE BY JESUS WEPT.

But yeah, this blog is far from being solely at the back of my mind. The ideas are still there, the characters are still kicking my grey matter and because i'm a weird motherfucker the old stories still make me chuckle.

2018 might be better. Notice my choice of words here. We'll see. Hopefully a new smartphone linked to Google will, y'know, remind me to update more often.


16/04/2017

DISREGARD THE LAST ENTRY I'M AN IDIOT.

So, yeah, this entry went up way later than anyone could've anticipated. The main reason for this? Work! Work decided to throw a LOT of overtime my way and working five nights a week, while good for the wallet, is not good for the soul. In the space between this entry and my last entry, I had to quit one job to work the other, a new President got elected and World War Three is about to happen and, in general, there is no way anybody could make up the shit that is currently happening in the world today.

I'm not going to bother making any more promises in regards to a publishing schedule. As I said before, i've got some scenarios in mind and one will (hopefully) be completed for around Halloween. In what is doubtlessly a bad omen, I haven't started writing the Snake Eater saga yet so it will be interesting to see when that gets finished (2025, i'm guessing) On the plus side, it's not like Konami will be releasing any new console MGS games! #FuckKonami #JimSterlingIsMyBigFatHusbando.

So, up is the newest entry in EIGHT MONTHS. Fucking hell. I won't lie: It sat on the verge of completion since December. Yep, that's right, it could've been up in December but thank you to my job! A stronger person could've willed themselves into completing it fully but I really cannot overstate just how much five nights a week takes out of you and kills any desire to write.

Nevertheless, the inaugural entry of 2017 is up so, hopefully, we'll see some more coming soon. Oh, we definitely will. There won't be an eight month wait before the next entry.

I hope.

I'M NOT MAKING PROMISES PEOPLE.

But anyway, thank you to the two people who still read this blog.

19/08/2016

Well fuck. Work's been kicking my ass and I recently came off of a very bad infection in my right hand, which pretty much ensured I couldn't type. Had it not been for that infection, this entry would've been up sooner. Thankfully, it's cleared and the new entry has FINALLY been published.

It's quite rough. Writing it was proving to be a chore towards the end but it's finally out. The next one should, hopefully, be substantially better. The only issue right now is time management. Between working two jobs (Stewarding and night porter) and squeezing in the gym around all that (plus vidya games), it's getting more and more difficult to write IN GENERAL, never mind my blog, and I fucking love writing.

The next update should be up fairly soon. I won't give an exact date since I seem to operating on Valve Time at the moment (The only difference being I can count up to and beyond 3.) but it shouldn't be another four months. It should be up sometime next month. Fingers crossed.

No, i'm not abandoning this blog. That'll never happen. I love writing this blog otherwise i'd cobble together a shitty ending and end it all in an instant. As I said, i've come up with a lot of ideas and it's just a case of getting the ball rolling. 2016 has, sadly, been a fairly slow year. As I get more used to this new job, however, things will pick up again.

On a side note: Almost 10,000 views. Not bad considering how shit and niche the blog is.

26/04/2016

As you can tell, things are going swimmingly! I added a new page as a compendium of sorts in regards to the Universe we've got going on. I'm currently thinking up a very basic, quite shitty MS Paint map of Beale and Walker Street to aid people in visualising the whereabouts of where the action is.

I've also updated the Biographies page. All i've done is added the names of all of the characters and the bare basic skeleton i'll be using to fill it out with.

This new job has me working nights. As such, it gives me plenty of time to think up new, crazy adventures (I already have an idea for a one-off special which is going to be....well, fucking crazy.) and the bios. The main issue right now is, as you can guess, the training. Yep, there is a lot of training involved in my new job but i'm trying to just squeeze this next entry in before the end of April. I doubt it will make it but these final two entries are being written pretty fast so you can expect them to be out with little wait between them.

After the Snake Eater Saga, we move onto the actual Guns of the Patriots Saga (Since I started this, they've already released...four additional games. Maybe five. FUCK I'M SLOW.) immediately after they return. After that, I COULD end the story then and there.

But I won't.

In 2018, a decade after this project hit Blogspot, I plan to have the Guns of the Patriots saga wrapped up. After that, who knows? But it won't end, i'll tell you that much. I have got a lot of ideas swimming in my head and I can tell you that there are many more years of material to come.

Once the Guns of the Patriots Saga is over, I'm thinking of NOT focusing on the other games (What's the point, really, after their story is done?) but instead just renaming this blog "The Mercenaries" and going balls to the wall with my own little universe.

One thing's for sure: Shit is going to go down.

Oh, and the last entry of this Saga has me going back to roots. As much as I LOVE formulating the plot, I do miss the old days where I basically throw shit into a blender and create random, nonsensical scenarios for the mercenaries. Considering there's no feedback against it (And I do have some favourable feedback for those older entries. Some. Not much, but some.), i'm going to go ahead with it.

 28/03/2016

Exactly three months since my last update. However, there is some good news: I managed to secure myself a job. In fact, I have two jobs: Part-time and full-time. Though my full-time job hasn't started yet, it's a night job which means plenty of time for writing.

Now that it's out of the way, i'm letting everybody know that writing has continued in earnest. The entry is very close to completion, but i'm unsure as to whether or not it's close enough to be released this month. It'll be released at the beginning of next month AT THE VERY LATEST.

8th of April: That's the VERY LATEST you can expect the entry to be published.

28/01/2016

No update this month. Trying my best to get a job and since several professional writing competitions are open for entries, they are taking precedence over this blog.

We'll probably get an update next month. There is quite a twist to this blog entry and the one after it will be the last one of this saga, setting us up for an MGS3 summer of (not so) fun.

30/11/2015

As you can probably guess, there is no update this month. There'll be no Christmas Special: Just a plain ol' entry next month.

You may be wondering why this is. Well, there are no excuses: It's Fallout 4.

Yep, that's right. Blame Bethesda and their Settlement Building Simulator.

Maybe i'll have two up next month. We'll see.

16/11/2015

I know very few of you read this page. Very few of you read this blog, even, but today I am initiating a call to arms.

For those of you who don't know, I live in the United Kingdom. Though there are many things wrong with this country (Mainly the government), one of the last true great British institutions is the National Health Service (Which the Conservative dogs and whores are trying to destroy..) This service provides excellent healthcare whenever possible and all for free, funded by the taxpayer because British people are genetically apathetic to the plight of others. The American healthcare system, in contrast, is a vile parasite that is designed to preserve the lives of the rich and fortunate whilst killing the power, because Americans don't want to pay a bit extra monthly to fund a healthcare system that could actually save their asses when push comes to shove.

So, what's the point of this rant? Well, it's to see if we can get some help going.

For those of you who don't know, the Beauty and the Beast Unit in Metal Gear Solid 4 were modelled off of four women. One of the women, Mieko Rye, has recently been diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer. This is the highest grade of breast cancer but is still treatable, and treatment is of the utmost essence to prevent it from spreading to other areas of the body. The outlook is still relatively good if caught early, but thanks to the nature of the American healthcare system, the cost for such treatment is high.

Mieko is still working, because of the cost of this treatment and because she has a child to support. As an Asatruar, I admire a Norse spirit and commend a warrior mentality to carry on when the world is weighing down on you. Cancer is a fucking horrendous disease, and maybe if we as a species could pull our heads from our collective asses and stop bombing eachother in the name of some invisible sky man, we could terminate cancer once and for all. Sadly, that isn't the case.

So, maybe we can do SOME good. I know for a fact that this plea won't reach nearly enough people to breach the $20,000 mark (Although I will be submitting a similar topic to Reddit in the hopes that maybe we can help even more) but maybe we can do something for her. Even if you only donate one dollar, it's one dollar giving the middle finger to the fucking horrendous American healthcare system, and that is worth more than its weight in gold in my opinion.

https://www.gofundme.com/miekorye

Come on, assholes. Let's help.

31/10/2015

Newest entry published. Next one will be somewhat longer.


My laptop is on its final legs so i'm going to try and rush out a few banners tomorrow. No promises, though, and i'm not sure if I should just bury it now and be done with it.

http://innerhaven.proboards.com/ is back up. I was going to create a new forum but I am seriously, seriously, SERIOUSLY limited for time these days. Redundancy is an absolute fucking bitch and it's funny how i'm doing more work now that i'm out of work than I ever did when I was at work.

Stress is very slowly killing me.

 10/10/2015

Well, the newest entry has been published. It's a bit short and a bit shit. Sorry about that, but I just wanted to get this done as quickly as possible and get it out and posted.

Header will be updated shortly. My graphics are on my laptop so the moment I can log on there, i'll get it updated.

The next entry should be a bit better. No refunds if that turns out to be a lie, though.

30/09/2015

I'm busy training on a course to receive my SIA badge. So, because of this, writing has been somewhat slow and, as you can see, the blog won't be updated for the end of the month.

Sorry about this, but i've got to get my shit sorted out. The blog should definitely be updated sometime next week but let's not hold our breath. As the year comes to an end, shit is going to get awfully hectic and in all honesty, the blog is always last on the list to focus on.

 ***

31/08/2015

As you can see, there were no delays and we have updated! Also, I was made redundant on Friday.

My life a shit.

***

15/08/2015

Still waiting on my new PC. Delivery is estimated to be Monday, Tuesday or even Wednesday. Writing is somewhat slow as i'm more concerned with the status of my PC (Considering I dropped about two months worth of pay on it) than with writing.

***

02/08/2015

 Just a little update in regards to a new forum: Inner Haven has been down for about two months now. It's going to stay that way for a good while, but i'm hoping to have a new forum up and running sometime next week.

I'm having my own internet line installed on the Friday (14th) and hopefully i'll have a PC coming on the Monday (10th) or Tuesday (11th). How quickly things progress depends on how well this installation goes and how quickly I can get the PC up and running and transfer my files to it.

 I'll be using Proboards, just because it's easier for me to use.

 Next update is still on track, but let's just see how next week goes.

***

30/07/2015

So, I figured that if I ever needed to delay the blog, I could just write it here. Other than that, this page is just going to be for miscellaneous news and, as such, it will rarely be updated.

As it stands, the official update frequency of the blog stands at THE END OF EVERY MONTH. This is highly unlikely to change.

I have a new PC arriving in August. While I doubt anything will go wrong (Not for the fucking money i'm paying to have it built), there may be a delay. Should this happen, there'll be two entries for September at least.

I put New Haven (For all 2 of you that visited, the one website for Mercenaries news) in maintenance mode and am (not) busy creating a new one. It should go live sometime in the next decade. Who knows?

Over 8000 views! Amazing! According to Blogspots own statistics, these are the countries who have racked up the most visits:

1) United States
(Well, duh.)
2) United Kingdom
 (LONG LIVE BRITANNIA GOD SAVE THE QUEEN)
3) Germany
(Much love to my Germanic cousins!)
4) Russia
(Большая любовь к России! Fuck, I hope that says what I think it says.)
5) Ukraine
(I like how Ukraine and Russia are battling for spot #4)
6) Canada
(Doubtlessly offended by now.)
7) France
(I do like the French. Honestly. Hey, at least you guys are free in the story..)
8) Ireland
(Doubtlessly pissed off by me bringing up the IRA. Or pleased.)
9) China
(China has good taste. Good taste indeed.)
10) Poland
(POLAND: FIRST TO FIGHT, LAST TO RUN. POLSKA WALCZ!)




Of course, this is Blogspot's reporting. A check of Google Analytics reveals that, since 2010, the picture is very different.

But fuck it, I like this table.

Google Analytics highlights that, since 2010, we've painted the globe. Countries such as South Africa, Zimbabwe, Brazil, Japan, New Zealand and Australia are in on the action.

Whatever the real picture is, however, thank you all for visiting this blog and reading it. Even if nobody comments, I do it for you, the Russians.

....Okay, and the Poles, and the Irish, and the Chinese, Brazilians, British, Canadians...All of you. Thank you all.
 

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